I have been struggling with my back for almost three weeks now. It has ebbed and flowed, showing up in different places and at various levels of pain…but it will not release entirely. It began as a reminder that when I am weak, God is my strength. And as I accepted it as a “thorn in my flesh” so to speak, I was peaceful. And then, I got impatient with it and tried to find a way to extract it myself…which made it worse. And then, I missed my long run on Saturday because of it. And then…the Lord took me deeper into what He has already been showing me about His will. The lesson I thought was complete went deeper and Lord willing, it is now complete or it will continue still.
Merely saying "Lord willing" is not enough. It is verbal confirmation of a change in an attitude; an attitude of true submission to His authority and control over my daily life. It is aligning my will with His will and accepting His changes to my plans and rejoicing in it. I can rejoice because it is a clear expression of His love for me and His purpose for my life that He revises my plans. With this deeper understanding of “Lord willing”, I can rejoice in laying down my will and accepting His when the two are not aligned. I can accept changes in my day that may not have been my choice but are clearly His direction. It becomes less of an obstacle or revision and more a tangible expression of God’s desire for my life. In difficult times I cling to Him. In exciting times I glory in Him. But in all things I can rejoice knowing that He is with me, guiding me every step of my day. It is all about my willingness to sacrifice self to follow Him.
Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways! For WHO HAS KNOWN THE MIND OF THE LORD, OR WHO BECAME HIS COUNSELOR? Or WHO HAS FIRST GIVEN TO HIM THAT IT MIGHT BE PAID BACK TO HIM AGAIN? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him {be} the glory forever. Amen. Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, {which is} your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith. Romans 11:33-36 and 12:1-3
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