Marathon Themes and Theme Songs

For the last few years, God has a way of meeting me and teaching me in and through my marathons. The Theme of Pacific Crest in 06 was all about perseverance, enduring and waiting...the Lord prepared me for the rest of our adoption wait through this lesson. It was painful, but I was aware of Him every step of the way and I did not quit...the race or the wait for Zoey. 

In Portland 07, my theme song was "Wait upon the Lord" by Lincoln Brewster which is not on my ordinary play list. But I kept running into it the week before and it played continuously through my head during the entire race and I had the kind of race that leaves you scratching your head at the finish line because it was so easy and painless. It was the perfect object lesson to how, as a Christian, when I wait upon the Lord and run within HIs will and by the strength He provides, my way is easy and my burden is light. 

Eugene 08 was about following the Lord. I have never followed a pace leader and for some reason I found myself behind the 3:45 guy and feeling great...as long as I kept my eyes on him. This was a Hebrews 12:1-2 object lesson..."Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from start to finish. [fn] He was willing to die a shameful death on the cross because of the joy he knew would be his afterward." (NLT) I pictured the pace leader as Jesus, fixed my eyes on him, and at the finished, he turned around, ran the 10 yards or so back to me and ran me in saying "you are finishing strong." I get teary just thinking of that one! If that guy had only known what I just learned...and Who he had just represented to me.

So this last week, I was inundated with the song "The Motions" by Matthew West. He has a page dedicated to this very song where people can post their desire to forgo complacency in their Christian walks and live for Jesus. I pictured myself running with Jesus...leaving all of me on the course...giving it all I had. I just didn't picture it with cramping legs, throbbing feet, an upset stomach, three port-a-potty breaks and almost throwing up on my way back to the Hotel. I didn't hear from God, didn't ever feel Him with me and I was most disappointed in that...not my painful yet mediocre finish time. But then, when we left the hotel and got in the car to leave, what song came on the radio at that moment? Yup, The Motions. I listed again to the words carefully and it hit me and I began to cry. It wasn't about giving the race all I had and running blissfully with Jesus...that would have been nice, but it also had a very personal and worldly goal in it. It was about how my life would be if I just go through the motions of living for and with the Lord, but having my own ideas of how that is done and no Him. God called me to run...but it wasn't for my glory (which He has taught me before)...it was and still is for His. Needless to say this song was very certainly the theme song for this marathon. It was from the Lord. And it was an object lesson. It just wasn't what I envisioned and I'm so glad. For it is truly so much sweeter this way! Thank you Jesus, for my painful and mediocre finish today. 

Here are the lyrics below. You can also listen on line at:http://www.matthewwest.com/motions/.

This might hurt 
It’s not safe 
But I know that I’ve gotta make a change 
I don’t care If I break 

At least I’ll be feeling something 
‘Cause just ok 
Is not enough 
Help me fight through the nothingness of life 

Chorus
I don’t wanna go through the motions 
I don’t wanna go one more day 
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me 
I don’t wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything? 
Instead of going through the motions 

No regrets 
Not this time 
I’m gonna let my heart defeat my mind 
Let Your love 
Make me whole 
I think I’m finally feeling something 

Take me all the way 
Take me all the way 
Take me all the way

The Washing of Feet

Yesterday I was searching the gospels for a specific "story" and ended up in a whole different place. I was drawn to that account of the Last Supper when Jesus washed His disciple's feet in John Chapter 13. Several things struck me. 

First, the Creator of the Earth and the Most High God, clothed in the flesh of a man, removed his outer garments, got on His hands and knees and washed His disciples feet. This brought tears to my eyes. That God, who created all things and is worthy of all glory and praise, did not think it too lowly to wash the feet of those He created. And if that were not enough, the next day He was beaten, mocked, spat upon and hung on a cross to die by those who should have known Him. And He did it of His own free will. 

Second, he washed the feet of the one who said he loved Him, but who loved money more than Him and ultimately betrayed Him for silver. Yes, Judas was at that dinner, for Jesus repeatedly said that there was one among them that was not clean and would betray Him. I wonder what Judas was thinking as he sat there and allowed Jesus to wash his feet knowing what he had already agreed to do. And yet I am reminded that each time I seek the things of this world over the things of God, I am guilty of the same. But because He has purchased me with His blood and I am His, He calls me out of darkness and into light where I lay sweetly broken in remembrance of all He has done for me. I've found that through the process of brokenness I am made more whole. Judas never knew this for overcome with guilt, he hung himself from a tree; for he let Jesus clean him on the outside but not on the inside. 

Lastly, He did this as an example of how I am to love others. I am not to think so highly of myself that I don't just consider humility as something I do but also as something that I should desire more to be. That is one of the reasons I enjoy working at a running shoe store. Each time I sit at the feet of a customer and place shoes on their feet, I am reminded of this act. And yet in comparison to what God did when He washed the feet of His disciples, it is not enough. 

I do not wish to remain ignorant of my lowly stature in the light of the Most High God. I am but dust and yet, He loves me. He loves me so much He died for me and He calls me His bride. His beloved. His. And He feels the same about you.

An Age Old Debate

I have a friend who is a very intelligent, well spoken and compassionate person who also happens to be an atheist. She was not always an atheist, she actually spent a few years as an evangelical Christian. But something happened and since then, she has been on a quest to disprove God. She and I have some pretty intense, yet respectful conversations. This is the result of a statement she made to me regarding the Bible and my response. 

I appreciate your point of view, I really do. But the way I see it, we choose what to believe be it through our human intellects or through a divine Creator. Once we make that choice, what we see, what we hear and how we react to those around us is all filtered through that choice. And maybe I’m wrong. Or maybe you are wrong. Or maybe, we are both wrong. It’s that old line of reason...if you are right not to believe in God or eternity, we are both in the same boat. If I’m right, then my boat is the ark of salvation and yours is a sinking ship. But that’s the thing, Love always provides a choice.

I don’t read the Bible the way you do. You said people should find the Bible the way you do, as: “a historically bloody, savage, unkind, cold, contradictory book that does absolutely no good in promoting the concept the ALL human life is good, valuable and worthy of respect in its own right.” I agree and I disagree. 

I agree that it is a historically accurate book that details bloody, savage, unkind, and cold acts of men and contains seemingly contradictory concepts (i.e., love and war, killing and healing, judgement and mercy, revenge and compassion) from a Loving yet Punishing God. 

But I disagree that it does no good in promoting the concept that all human life is good, valuable and worthy of respect. I find the contrary. In Genesis, after God created the world AND man, He said that it was good. I firmly believe that God does not create anything that has no value...it is man that devalues God and His creation (which includes men). But there is a sin element that you can not deny...and that did come after God created man. So God still creates what is good, but because sin reigns here and now, we are subject to the pull towards “bad” for lack of a better word. 

Even when a person is “born again” in the spirit, as long as the flesh is alive, there will be a continual battle within that person between good and evil (the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak)...but at least there is an awareness and a battle. Sometimes that battle can be difficult for someone and in their desire to appear “good” they hide behind a veil of legalism and point their finger at others to take attention from their own faults. But that’s a whole other story. 

When we deny that there is bad in us, or when we think we can be good in our own efforts or obtain status as a basically a good person, we fail to see that we are subject to this world as long as we live in it. And this world has forces that are contrary to goodness...like men in Africa who refuse to wear a condom or stay faithful and do what pleases them despite who it hurts. Are these men good because ALL human life is good? Are these men evil because ALL human life is subject to evil? I’d say they are ruled by their flesh which is being directed by evil, but that they have the capacity in their souls to do good because that is how they were made. But it would not be acceptable for me to correct their “cultural” atrocities with my “religious views”.

But everything I just wrote swings on the hinge that you believe Genesis Chapters 1 and 2. Why do you think people so desperately want the big band theory and evolution to be true? So they don’t have to believe that we were made perfectly by a loving God and yet were corrupted by the first man and are on a personal journey back to good. 

We could argue those points ad nauseum and we’d never get anywhere. But I want to say one thing about the part that nowhere do you see the bible promoting the concept that human life is valuable. I just don’t see that. If human life was not seen as valuable to God, why the cross? The whole Old Testament is a long account that shows us the evil that entered into the world through Adam and the result: all of the Old Testament accounts of wars, slavery, and the basic darkness that is present on earth and in men’s hearts. And then, through all of that, you keep seeing God’s love, His anger at sin consequences (not men, but men ruled by sin), His mercy, His warnings, His desires for relationship and reconciliation. If you can’t see this, then why the books of Hosea, Song of Solomon (or Song of Songs) or Ruth in the Old Testament...all three are stories of redemption and perfect love. And why the promises to Abraham and Jacob and David in the midst of all that darkness? Why wouldn’t God just start over? Because of Love.

God made man good and He enjoyed a relationship with him. All creation was in harmony. And then, sin entered in and changed all that...and separated God and man. The bait was to know good and evil like God in and of their own minds. A friend of mine shared something with me recently and it totally made sense to me. When God cast Adam and Eve out of the garden...was He mad? You might say yes...shoot, before my conversation with this friend I would have said yes...but she made a very good point. The reason they were cast out of the garden was so that they would not eat of the fruit of the tree of life...and be eternally separated from Him...not because God was mad. It is only through their death that there could be opportunity for resurrection and eternal life with God. Because the wages of sin is death. When Jesus died on the cross, He paid the sin debt of all men who believe (past, present and future). In Matthew 27:50-53 we read of the saints that rose from their graves and after His resurrection, they appeared unto people throughout Jerusalem. Those saints were those who believed God by faith and it was counted to them as righteousness...this is Hebrews Chapter 11 and most poignantly found in verse 6. 

So what is the point...the point is, if we deny our creator, this life is all we’ve got. Apart from God, the point of life is birth, life, death. Apart from God, my life is a by chance with no future but death in nothingness. I can’t look at myself in the mirror or my kids, or the person on the side of the road holding a sign asking for food without feeling we were made for a reason and that this is all there is. Apart from love, nothing else matters. Love is what makes the life of the man on the street with no job and sign as “valuable” as mine. And yet to retailers, he is worth nothing compared to me because I have money I can spend at their store. It’s men who devalue men. 

Why did Mother Theresa spend all those years caring for the sick and destitute? Out of love. Why did she not promote condoms to protect their physical bodies during sex? Because perhaps she knew that while a condom might protect their flesh, it does nothing to feed or protect their souls. At the core, the Catholic church may have good reasons not to promote condoms, but it comes out as legalistic rules because so much of what they do causes separation. It is so much like the Jews of Jesus’ day. If a jew were to walk through the market and even brush up against a gentile, they would go home, burn their clothes and wash themselves. Why? Because of the 70 years of captivity in Babylon. The Jews were God’s chosen people to deliver His message of love to the world. But rather than influencing people toward God, they were influenced away from God. So God would correct them, they’d repent, come back and the cycle would start all over again. Did this anger God? Yes...or more perhaps more accurately it grieved Him because it hurt people. At various points the Jews worshipped man made gods like Baal, Mammon and Ashtaroth. I believe it was the Mammon idols that were made of metal and they would heat the arms of the idol to incandescent heat and place their babies on the arms, sacrificing them to their god for prosperity. So God, in love, warned His Chosen people through the prophets, but no one wanted to listen because it didn’t “feel” good and frankly, it was something they could control. One can’t “control” the true and living God because He does not change. So He sent them to Babylon for 70 years, when they came back, they never strayed again. So that is where they were in Jesus’ day, afraid of even touching a gentile lest they be lead astray. And they added rules to the law so they would always remember to keep the law...but then it became what they could do to earn God’s favor which is rooted in pride and self sufficiency and not love. And God is about Love...about relationship. So He sent His Son. And that is where God is different than any other god. 

God values ALL men so much He died for them. John 3:16 doesn’t say God so love a few people, it says the WORLD. In John 3:17 it says He sent His Son into the world NOT to condemn it, but to save it. I think God is about valuing people. I think giving people condoms and saying you are protected so “go do what feels good” rather than investing in their person, in their lives, in their need for love and understanding, devalues them. It reduces them to a sexual animal, not a human worthy of time, effort and relationship. 

I could go on...you of all people know that. And I’m sure all I have written hasn’t made a lick of difference if you’ve even made it this far. But know that I’ve heard what you said. I could spend time studying the psychology of religion...but it would be a waste of time. I spent enough time seeing psychology play out in my life...it wasn’t until I was broken with nothing left in this world that mattered to make me feel good about myself that Jesus picked me up and filled me with His spirit and gave me new life. And the person I am today is a far cry from the person I was then. Am I good...no, on the contrary I realize that the best part of me is not of me. I strive to do what is right and I get it right some of the time. But I’m a work in progress. And by knowing that I’m not inherently good and others are not inherently good, gives me a whole lot of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self control when dealing with my failures and the failures of others. I am now at a place where I share my faith not to be right, prove a point or correct someone...but purely to give an answer for my joy. 

I accept that you do not approve of ANY religion. I can see why and frankly, that’s why I go to a church that is independent of a convention and operates simply to love others and study God’s Word in its entirety. I find you to be a very caring, thoughtful, articulate and intelligent person. I feel the connection we share is because we both care deeply for people and each other. As steeped as you are in all your books about psychology and anti religions sentiments and as satisfying as you find that, I’m steeped in one book...the Bible, and I find it to be a lively word, that satisfies completely. Like I said before, I appreciate your perspective because it makes me dig deeper in the Word of God because so much of what your are about is to question Him and to find fault with Him by way of the people that so sadly misrepresent Him. And I find that so contrary to your heart that in many ways is so much like Him, which makes sense because He made you. Or at least that’s what I think. ;) 

Who We Are When We Are His

I had a very special conversation with a friend via e-mail recently and I couldn’t think of a better way to express the very ideas the Lord has been teaching me in the last two weeks as I study 1 Peter. Her words are in red, mine are in blue. The few edits I’ve made are to secure her identity and to fix grammatical errors. I submit this here with her blessing. 

We're wrapping up the Bible study on the life of David, and it has been so good. God knew it was EXACTLY what I needed. We've dealt head-on with so many of my issues with God - the legalism, the harshness, etc.... 

One thing that God has been doing in my life is showing me that by trying to hide what I've been through, I'm robbing myself of being able to share the wonderful work He's doing in my life. 

The other day, I was praying for a "so far" experience with God (when David just fell back on his knees and asked God, who am I and who is my family that you've brought us this far?). And, suddenly, He opened my eyes and I realized that He has given me a 'so far' experience already. I've just been spending the last several years trying to make sure no one ever knew that I was divorced, had been in an adulterous relationship, etc. And, by doing that, I haven't been able to see or admit how far God has brought me. I have a wonderful husband who loves me and God with all his heart, I have incredible children, etc etc etc. 

If you look at who I was toying at an affair with and what my life would have been like with him, it's INCREDIBLE to see what my life is now. God's mercy and grace were poured out on me lavishly all along the way, and I never even recognized it. 

I am still struggling to believe in my heart that God has forgiven me and loves me, but I'm so much closer to believing that than ever before. 

My friend, have I got some words for you. I've been learning the same thing over the last few weeks and most profoundly in the life of Peter. I have to walk you through this...this is the product of two different teachings/studies I've been part of in the last two weeks.

Let's start with Peter denying Christ. Mark Chapter 14 is the account we studied in Church. In Verse 31 it says: "But he spake the more vehemently, If I should die with thee, I will not deny thee in any wise. Likewise also said they all." In verse 31, Jesus predicted he would deny him before the cock crew 3 times. But Peter strongly denied that. And sure enough, 20 or so verses later, Peter denies Him 3 times each followed by a cock’s crow. 

Luke 22:32 says: But I have prayed for thee (Simon/Peter), that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren. This is additional information from the same denying conversation and it will make sense in just a second why I put it here. 

Then we went to John 21 and saw Peter in his boat, fishing after Jesus died...and catching nothing. Then Jesus shows up, they pull in the big catch and Peter joins Jesus at the fire where there is already fish roasting on the fire. This is the conversation where Jesus asks Peter 3 times if he loves Him and Peter answer 3 times that He does. 

The picture of conversion (Greek word for Convert in Luke 22:32 is epistrephō which is a picture of turning back). In Jewish teaching, Rabbi's are skilled at teaching in a circular way. They start at a point and then kind of walk in a circle seeming to stray until it all comes "full circle" and the point is seen. The same picture is seen of repentance. Not just a turning back, but a returning to the start and doing it over. So in Luke 22:32 we see that Jesus has prayed for Peter very specifically. And then in John's fish supper account, you see Jesus turn Peter back around so he may begin a new as a disciple again. We never see Peter the same again. In fact in Acts Chapter 2, 4 and 5, we see a very different Peter. A Peter who is bold and who stands in front of the very men that killed Jesus and says "I will not stop preaching Jesus...we will obey God, not men". 

And I'm sure you know that Peter's name was Simon, which means rock or stone and Jesus named him Peter which also means rock but the picture is of a HUGE CLIFF sized rock...not just a stone.  Jesus called Peter Big Rock long before he became one. Because God sees us from our future, not our present or our past. He knows what we will become and speaks of us as if we are already there. 

So now, here is the coolest part. In my Bible study, we are studying 1 Peter. We began last week in Chapter 1 verse one and that is as far as we got. Because it reads: Peter, an apostle of Jesus Christ, to the strangers scattered throughout Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia, and Bithynia. 

What’s the big deal? It’s how Peter introduces himself. He does not identify himself as Simon. Or Simon Peter. Or Peter the son of Jonas.  Or any of the many ways people could and did qualify themselves in that day. He was just Peter, an apostle of Jesus Christ. That is a bold, strong and honest statement. But more importantly, Peter only identified himself with who he was in Christ presently...but he no longer identified himself by his past. He was not Simon Peter, Son of Jonas, denier of Christ three times and a fisherman. He was Peter, big cliff rock, and not only a friend of Jesus, but His disciple. A leader. A teacher. A fisher of men. 

So here is my point. We don't have to hold on to our past identifiers...we are new creations in Christ. We can pull on past experiences to give comfort and counsel, but they no longer define who we are. We do not have to feel the sting of our past sins. We can walk in freedom. 

"So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" 2 Corinthians 5:16-17

Guess what? I am divorced, but now I am married. I have been an adulterer, but I now I am faithful. I was a liar, but now I walk in truth. I once spoke only words of death, but now I speak the Words of life. I've done so many horrible things and yet, I have been made new. I don't have to identify myself with those sins because they have been confessed, forgiven and covered in the blood of Jesus. They are things I once did, but they are not who I am. I don’t do all things perfectly, but by God’s spirit inside me I am constantly being made new. When I fall, Jesus is always there to pick me up. I am free from the bounds of sin.

Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. John 8:34-36

You have a choice, we all have a choice...to accept the Words of Christ that tell you that you are free from your sins...or to listen to the accuser and the enemy of our souls who continually strives to remind you of what has already been washed away. 

Me too.

Thank you for sharing the very, very good study on Peter. A lot of what you said hit home. 

For me, I was so dead set at the time it all happened that I was not going to let anyone find out that for a long time, I rejected repentance - b/c I feared God would require of me for it to be brought into the open. Ridiculous, I know, but that's where I was at the time. And, since my ex-husband certainly had done more than his fair share of destroying the marriage, I could easily lay all the blame with him and walk away.....or so I thought. 

Through the last 13 years or so, I've walked through repentance, but hanging on to the secret for so long has really hindered my life in so many ways. It's very sad how self-destructive we can be. I haven't been able to walk away from that sin, b/c I was hiding it, protecting it, carrying it everywhere with me in a little veil of secrecy. 

Well, no more. I don't plan to sit my parents down and tell them everything or anything like that. But, I'm done carrying the responsibility of trying to hide it. I've laid it down. Funny though, when you carry something for so long, you find yourself looking for it when the load feels lighter......... 

Thank you for sharing with me. The things you've brought back to my memory about Peter and his life will be very helpful to me as I walk for the first time in years without my sin! 

It's so COOL that you included this: Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. John 8:34-36 

Because I was just, 5 MINUTES AGO, reading this: Hebrews 12:7,8 .....God deals with you as sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 

For YEARS, I've equated discipline to punishment and punishment to the fact that God doesn't love me. This morning, it hit me like a ton of bricks that God disciplines me BECAUSE He loves me not because He hates me. Easy truth, right? First grade Christianity, but it's something that doesn't come naturally to me....believing God loves me.........believing love can be given to imperfect people. 

But, by His spirit and His word, He is changing my views. So, not only am I a son of God, a permanent member of the family and free, but I am also loved enough to be disciplined when necessary. If I reject that discipline (which I have done in the past), then I am relegating myself to the life of an illegitimate child........missing out on all the blessings of being a true son of God. 

Just before I opened your mail, I told God that I am finally ready after all these years to learn the lessons of the discipline He has been handing out as a result of my sin. I'm taking hold of full sonship, not settling for being anything other! It's not going to be an instant change, I'm sure, but it's coming. So, pray for me that God will keep this all fresh in my spirit as He heals and restores me. 

Oh, and one other really cool thing about being a son of God. Notice I didn't say 'child of God.' I was reading somewhere a while back about the Jewish culture and how sons were the only ones who received an inheritance from their fathers and how when Christ died for us, He provided a way for us all to be adopted into God's family in the position of sonship............fully eligible to receive the FULL blessing and inheritance of God. I'm a SON of God!!!!! 

____________

I don't have much time but first things first...I'm so excited for you. God's timing is perfect. Much of Beth Moore's ministry is because she walked in chains similar to yours for so long. But God used that as part of her testimony to call others to freedom. And He'll do the same for you. Because He works good in all things for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose...to make us more like Him. Someday you will share this truth with someone who needs freedom from a sin as much as you did/do and you will share it and the sting will not be there. It will just be a fact. 

The other thing is when you were talking about sons and men. It dawned on me. Israel is always called God's wife and He their Husband. For the Christian, He is our Bridegroom and we are the Bride. Think of this...we have no eternal inheritance without our spouse or espoused. We are all women in need our man's covering for life. And if we choose to reject that relationship, we are in a sense, walking out in the desert without a covering and we are food for the enemy of our souls that moves to and fro through the earth in search of whom he might devour. 

I was Blind, but now I see

Do you know that God hears you. That He knows you, even if you don’t know Him. There is nowhere you can go that He isn't. There is nowhere you've been that He hasn't been Himself. When Jesus walked the earth, He was despised and hated by men...men that should have known Him, known Who He was, men who should have been looking for Him. The prophets foretold the exact moment He would enter Jerusalem as King. But they wanted Messiah to save them from the world, from the Romans, not from themselves, not from their sin. They had the law, and then they had their laws and they delighted in performing those laws in the sight of men. And I think that is where we get God wrong today. We want Him to fix our problems or rescue us in times of trouble, but we do not want to admit we need Him to save us from OURSELVES. We don't want to admit that the mess we are in has to do with the life we have been leading...the sin in our lives that comes with consequences. And it is sin that separates us from God...and each other. 

I'm reading a book called Overcoming Spiritual Blindness by a Dr. Gill. It is well written. Here are some quotes that just punched me in the gut: 
Page 61 “...we are truly dependent on the working of the Holy Spirit to bring conviction to our hearts, showing us the true nature of our sin through the Word of God. Only as we choose to recognize and confess our sin can we have our spiritual eyes opened, so that through repentance of our sin we can be cleansed and set free.”

Page 62 ...”sin is the most powerful force that separates us from God. It is also a powerfully divisive force to separate us from each other.”

“Many of us, even as we progress toward full faith, may discover that we have been embittered through life situations in our dealings with other people. And, closely related to the sin of bitterness, lurks the sin of jealousy that causes us to feel that we deserve more and to desire what others have. The ups and downs of relationships can create stormy emotions, which are more often expressed through divisive accusation of others. We must recognize all of these motivations as sin.”

I know bitterness is something I do not want nor is it good for me and will hinder my walk, but I see now so clearly that it is a sin. And of course it is because it usually has to do with something I think I deserve that I am not getting or something I’m getting I don’t think I deserve...and that’s just pride in different clothes. The cure for sin, and in this case bitterness, is once again found at the cross of Calvary. At the foot of the cross, I look up and imagine my Savior: sinless, perfect, lovely Jesus, bloodied battered and bruised by MY SINS. With that point of view, how can I be bitter toward anyone or anything in my life. If there is strife in my life, it is because of me...because of some sin in my life that I allow to take root and bring division and separate me from the person I am bitter toward. Or maybe it is their sin that produced sin in me through bitterness about their sin. Sin breeds sin. The reason bitterness is sin, is because it is contrary to the heart of God. So is unrighteous anger, malice, hatred, jealousy, and any negative feeling I have toward another person. 

And that brings me to my next point. God does not HATE or feel negative toward ANYONE. He loves EVERYONE. If you do not know that, it is because you do not know Him through a relationship paved by grace. But know this, if we fail to love Him and to accept His sacrifice as payment for our sins, we are choosing to be separate from Him. And if you live the rest of your life running from this truth, you are choosing to spend eternity separated from Him and that would be a place where He is not. It would be Hell...and Hell feels a lot like we do when we are separated from Him here and are angry and bitter and clinging to our sins and hating ourselves for it but trying to hide it underneath a pile of stuff that makes us look like we have it together. We can spend our lives denying God, but it doesn’t make Him any less real. And He is not angry, nor does He hate us. He loves us as parents love their Children. And He is waiting for us to turn toward Him and receive His grace, mercy and love. God does not send anyone to hell. People choose hell when they fail to choose a relationship with God through His Son Jesus while they breathe here on Earth. 

After wrapping my brain around something as glorious as this, there is only one thing I can say: Praise God! God is so Good! I want to shout it from the rooftops and act like a crazy lady. I'm out of my mind right now with JOY that He would choose to speak such life into and through me. Praise His Name! 

Jesus says in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Peter reiterates this when he says "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." (1 Peter 5:7) If you need peace today, no matter who you are, what you've done, where you've been; cry out to Jesus and let Him take you into His precious, wonderful arms and give you peace now and for all eternity.

Live in Wonderful Expectation

I'm mining 1 Peter Chapter 1 today as I lay low and allow the Lord to heal my body and my soul. It's funny how my soul aches are often less aggressive than my body aches. Anyway, I decided to read it in the New Living Translation today and this is what struck me:

1:3...for it is by His boundless mercy that God has given us the privilege to be born again. Now we live with a WONDERFUL EXPECTATION because Jesus Christ rose from the dead. (my emphasis)

I love the way they expressed the word Hope as wonderful expectation. It just struck me that even though my day may stink or I may feel crushed by the worries of this world, I am free to live with WONDERFUL EXPECTATION of new life in Heaven where there is no pain, sorrow, worries or hurts. That this life isn't all there is because Jesus defeated death. 

then 

1:6 So be truly glad! There is wonderful joy ahead, even though it is necessary for you to endure many trials for a while. 

Again, I can be glad because there is joy ahead. The trials here are of the world because we live in a fallen world. God gave man the title deed to Earth but when man sinned, he gave it to Satan. So we live in a world that is not our own and belongs to the enemy of God...and of our souls. But because Jesus defeated death on the cross, forgiving our sins, we have joy in store for us in Heaven through faith.

That just struck me today...that because of God's mercy and Christ's death and resurrection, I am free to live in Wonderful expectation and gladness despite the daily trials I live in presently. It's my choice to be weighed down by the world, or to look forward in expectation of better days.

It's just not about this world. That's when I look at people (and myself) striving, trying to fill their (my) lives with things, accomplishments, knowledge and success and I am sad. Because the answer to the aches inside us are not of this world. And we can live in wonderful expectation if only we would not only believe, but walk in that belief. There is treasure and glorious riches stored up for us in Heaven as seen right between those two verses in 1 Peter 1:4 For God has reserved a priceless inheritance for his children. It is kept in heaven for you, pure and undefiled, beyond the reach of change and decay.

I can't keep thinking about the hope I have in Heaven. The blessings I receive here on earth, and there have been many, pale in comparison to what lies in store. That thought makes me excited with wonderful expectation!

Rejoice! Be Glad! The Lord has wonderful things in storage for those who love Him and receive Him by faith. Have you done that?

Faith, Hope, and Healing

Now they came to Jericho. As He went out of Jericho with His disciples and a great multitude, blind Bartimaeus, the son of Timaeus, sat by the road begging.  

And when he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to cry out and say, 

"Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!" 

Then many warned him to be quiet; 

but he cried out all the more, 

"Son of David, have mercy on me!" 

So Jesus stood still and commanded him to be called. 

Then they called the blind man, saying to him, 

"Be of good cheer. Rise, He is calling you." 

And throwing aside his garment, he sprang and ran to Jesus. 

So Jesus answered and said to him, 

"What do you want Me to do for you?" 

The blind man said to Him, 

"Rabboni, that I may receive my sight." 

Then Jesus said to him, 

"Go your way; your faith has made you whole." 

And immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus on the road. 

Mark 10: 46-52